Office of Reconsideration
We accept returns
We do not accept the premise.
Below this line everything is true and plainly meant. We would rather be clear than clever about your money.
If it arrived damaged, misprinted, or is not what you ordered
We will replace it or refund it. That is the whole policy and there is no step in it designed to tire you out.
Contact us within 30 days of the parcel arriving, with your order number and a photograph of the problem. The photograph is the only thing we genuinely need and it is the thing people most often leave out.
If you ordered the wrong size, or changed your mind
We cannot take it back, and we would rather say so here than discover it with you later.
Nothing in this shop exists before you order it. Each item is printed for one person, on demand, and there is no shelf for it to return to. This is the honest cost of the model and it is the reason the size guide is worth two minutes before you buy.
If it never arrived
Start with tracking, which is usually quicker than we are. If tracking says delivered and it is not in your hands, tell us and we will chase it.
How to reach us
Reply to your order confirmation email. It reaches a person. Include the order number from that email, which is the eight characters after the hash.
A closing note from the Bureau
A return is not a failure of conviction. A citizen may receive the wrong garment through no fault of their own beliefs.
No record of your return is kept in the permanent file. There is no permanent file. There is a file, and it is not permanent.
Thank you for your attention to this matter